14 Aug

my doctor’s appointment was encouraging!

on the way to the surgeon’s office

I first had to have some xrays taken.  The machine has been around my head several times, but this time, with my mouth clamped shut, I panicked!  My nose got stuffy and I felt closed in, but endured it.

All the staff was encouraging, “you did great!  you look great!  you look better then the last one who was so super puffy…”  They reminded me that when I woke up in recovery at the hospital the first thing I said was, “HOT!  I’m HOT” and they thought i was asking for a hot blanket because usually people wake up cold.  They put icepacks everywhere they could as I tried to rip my gown off and I remember someone saying, “girl, you do NOT want to to that here, believe me!”

After xrays the doctor came in the took off all the elestic bands that were holding the two jaws together.  and the piece of white tap that covered some small stitches on the side.  I have tons of stitches inside my mouth that should dissolve.  I held Chris’ hand.  When he was finished he said, “and open….” and I could only open like 2 centimeters, but it was so great!  I cried, “I can breathe!!!!”  “AIR”

Then they gave me a tooth brush and I very awkwardly and carefully brushed my teeth, while it all seemed to run back out of my mouth.  Most of my mouth feels numb, big, swollen and hot…unable to control.  Chris took a video but I waved him away.  To be honest, it’s not fun looking in the mirror.  I just want to look like myself again, but I know it will take time, and I try to look and say thank you Lord’s…”thank you Lord for my arms!! etc”

The doctors assistant asked about our family and adoption and how all the children manage.  It was a great conversation, many people just don’t know the number of orphans, or our responsibility as believers in Christ to care…

The doctor put rubberbands in place just on the sides, it feels better for sure but still pretty “off”.  My head feels like it’s been hit really hard.  But I’m thinking of so much to be thankful for…

Our kids!  We met my parents at our house…it was a great reunion.  The girls had made a sign with beautiful drawings that was hung on the front door.  Thank you God for their love.

My mom had told the children not to run and jump on mommy the way they usually do…and they didn’t.  they were all very slow and careful.

I cried as I looked at the 3 little chinese girls specifically.  They all just looked…

beautiful to me.  one word.


Beautiful little souls and I cried mostly because in my heart I felt so thankful that God would shower me with the blessings of a big family, with 3 little souls who I could have missed out on.  Thankful that God entrusted them to my care.  It was emotional!

okay, okay, 2 words

1. beautiful

2. loud :)

Mom cried, I cried, Gigi cried, Zinnia clung to Chris and sobbed, then mimi cried!  Zinnia and Lainee said funny things.  Lainee said, “when will you be my mom again?” and I knew she meant when will you LOOK like mom again.

I then tried to eat some gf pasta all mashed up but it was hard not to gag, and then my stomach felt so nauseous.  I cannot chew any food for 5 more weeks.

The girls followed me around, looking at all my “supplies” as I organized them, the meds, the syringe, creams, etc.  “what this?” etc.  Zinnia couldn’t get her hands off me, saying over and over with a genuine heart, “mommy I so sorry.”  I tried to be upbeat, “Oh i’m fine!!!  Everyday will get better and better!”

after the little girls were in bed

Christopher suggested walking down to look at the sunset.

It was a short slow walk and so worth it.  The sky was beautiful pink.  Gigi was so sweet, walked behind the others at my side.

She cried and said, “mom, I was so worried about you, I’m so glad you are home…”  And I told her of the vision i had in the hospital.

me and gig.
you can’t tell but i’m actually smiling here, but my mouth doesn’t move yet!!

In the night, the second night, I was alone and needed pain med.  It was a hr. after my dose time and the nurse was running around busy as my pain mounted and mounted.  I prayed and prayed for comfort and it my sleepy-pain state I saw gigi by my hospital bed, with her hand on the rail.  It seemed so real that I gasped.  I know in my heart I missed her so much and had spent much time in prayer for her as she would be helping my mom and dad with the others.  She’s a quiet, gentle comforting soul, and the picture of her by my bed gave me comfort.

Thanks for prayers.

God is so faithful to provide all we need.

Last night we all sat on the big sofa and watched the LOR*X movie.  It felt so good.  Chris said, “normally we’d be watching the movie while you are running around cleaning up etc.  this is so nice!”  And gigi said, “has our whole family ever just sat and watched a movie???”  we all agreed it felt so nice.  So i’m thankful for the slowing down that God is pressing me down.  Sitting is really hard for me.

Not any more~

Sitting away….

“In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.” Isaiah 30:15

And I leave you today with a photo of our Luke, who is waiting for our arrival.  last night Chris prayed with me outside in the rocker.  He said, “Lord, please speed the way to Luke, bring him home soon, Lord…”  My eyes opened!  I squeezed Chris’ hand and he said, “well, in your perfect timing, Lord….”

And I know it will be,  He is trust worthy.  Luke will come home in his perfect timing.  Praise God.

Luke playing soccer with Chris at the transition home in addis. isn’t he precious. What a gift God has in store for our family.


3 Responses to “reunion”

  1. Carrie Lantry August 14, 2012 at 10:01 am #

    such precious moments, makes me teary. Praise the Lord for His faithfulness, feeling so dry and weary this morning, good to remember his faithfulness!

  2. sasha August 14, 2012 at 10:21 am #

    God is good! So great to see you with your kids! Praying for you!
    So proud of you. :)

  3. julie August 16, 2012 at 8:40 am #

    Beautiful! Thanks for showing us God with your words! You have your kids’ hearts for sure. Praying for a steady recovery! I loved your yogurt story–totally something that would happen to me…on a good day, ha!

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